My Toddler Only Poos in a Nappy – How Do I Move to the Toilet?

Your toddler is happily doing wees on the toilet.

They seem confident.

They understand the routine.

But when it comes to poo, it's a completely different story.

Maybe they:
• ask for a nappy before they poo
• hold on until you put a nappy on
• wait until the bedtime or nap time nappy goes on
• become upset when you suggest using the toilet when they need a poo

If this sounds familiar, you're not alone.

One of the most common potty training challenges parents face is a toddler who will happily wee on the toilet but will only poo in a nappy.

The good news?

This is incredibly common and it doesn't mean potty training has failed.

Why Poo Is Often Harder Than Wee

From a toddler's perspective, poos and wees are very different.

A wee happens quickly and many toddlers barely notice it.

A poo is:
• bigger
• slower
• more noticeable
• may only happen once or twice a day
• often accompanied by strong sensations

Many children find pooing much more emotional and much harder to let go of than weeing.

For some toddlers, the nappy has become part of the poo routine.

They've spent their whole life pooing in a nappy and it feels familiar, safe, and predictable.

Why Your Toddler Asks for a Nappy

Parents are often surprised when their toddler requests a nappy specifically for pooing.

This doesn't usually mean they're being stubborn.

In fact, it's often the opposite.

It shows they:
• recognise they need a poo
• understand what is happening in their body
• have developed awareness

The challenge isn't awareness.

The challenge is transferring the poo from the nappy to the toilet.

Don't Panic or Force the Issue

When parents become worried about pooing, it's understandable to start:

• encouraging more strongly
• negotiating
• offering rewards
• repeatedly asking them to try

Unfortunately, pooing is one area where pressure often makes things worse.

The more pressure a child feels, the more likely they are to hold on.

And holding on can quickly lead to constipation, which makes pooing even harder.

Think of It as a Transition, Not a Battle

Rather than seeing it as:

"My toddler refuses to poo on the toilet."

Try thinking:

"My toddler is still learning where poos belong."

This mindset shift is important.

Many toddlers need a gradual transition from:

• pooing in a nappy
to
• pooing standing in a nappy near the toilet
to
• pooing sitting on the toilet in a nappy
to
• pooing on the toilet without a nappy

The goal is progress, not perfection.

Check for Constipation First

Before working on toilet pooing, it's important to make sure constipation isn't playing a role.

Common signs include:

• small hard poos 
• very large poos that may black the toilet
• straining
• pain when pooing
• poos streaks in their underwear
• skipping several days between poos

Even mild constipation can make toilet training much more difficult.

If you're concerned, speak to your family doctor.

Celebrate Awareness

One mistake parents often make is focusing only on where the poo ends up.

But awareness is actually a huge milestone.

If your toddler:

• tells you they need a poo
• asks for a nappy
• goes to a particular place
• hides before pooing

These are all signs that they are becoming aware of what their body is doing.

And awareness is one of the foundations of successful potty training.

A Structured Approach Can Help

Poo problems often happen when parents feel they need to solve everything immediately.

But like all aspects of potty training, moving from nappies to the toilet is a skill that develops over time.

That's why some parents prefer a staged approach, such as Potty Pros Academy, where awareness, confidence, and routines are built gradually rather than expecting everything to happen at once.

For many children, once the pressure is removed and the foundations are in place, pooing on the toilet becomes much easier.

A Reassuring Reminder

A toddler who only poos in a nappy is not unusual.

In fact, many children master wees long before they feel comfortable pooing on the toilet.

The important thing is to:
• stay calm
• avoid pressure
• support awareness
• keep moving forwards gradually

For most children, this phase does pass.

FAQs

Why will my toddler wee on the toilet but not poo?

Pooing feels very different from weeing. Many toddlers find it more noticeable, emotional, and difficult to let go of, especially if they've always pooed in a nappy.

Should I force my toddler to poo on the toilet?

No.

Pressure can increase anxiety and lead to withholding, which may cause constipation and make the problem worse.

Is it normal for my toddler to ask for a nappy to poo?

Yes.

This is extremely common and often shows that your toddler is aware they need a poo. The challenge isn't usually awareness, it's helping them transfer that skill from the nappy to the toilet.

In the beginning, it is often best to give your toddler a nappy if they request one.

Many parents worry that if they don't provide a nappy, their child will simply use the toilet instead. However, for many toddlers, that step feels too big at that moment.

Rather than pooing on the toilet, they may consciously or unconsciously hold onto their poo instead.

This can lead to poo withholding and constipation, which can make the transition even harder because pooing may become uncomfortable, painful, or difficult to pass.

The first goal is helping your toddler stay relaxed and comfortable around pooing in a nappy near or on the toilet. Once that confidence is in place, you can gradually support the move from pooing in a nappy to pooing on the toilet.

If You Haven't Started Yet 

Many poo problems become easier when toddlers build awareness and confidence before nappies come off.

That's exactly why I created my free guide: 5 Things to Do Before Starting Potty Training

It walks you through the simple steps that help your toddler develop the foundations needed for successful potty training.